I've mentioned before how the insulin gives me weird dreams almost every night. Well, now things are getting a little meta for me because I've been dreaming about my insulin!
I've had a few dreams where I've taken my blood sugar or have felt a "low" while performing some task. But last night, I actually dreamed about giving myself the insulin shot. It would've been even more bizarre had my dream insulin given me a weird dream WITHIN my weird dream ... sort of like the Inception of diabetes management!
I guess my diabetes is on my mind a lot, as it should be. That's what is keeping me healthy, that I'm trying to be mindful and responsible. And I have been thinking about the insulin because I might be going off of it in a few weeks. I see my doctor in early October and if my numbers hold up, she'll start me on my way to being insulin-free.
Truthfully, I have mixed feelings about this. Obviously, it would be great if my body can function sans insulin shots and I can stay healthy by eating well and exercising. But I'm nervous that going off the insulin will cause a setback. I don't want to feel sick and run down again, or thirsty, or experince blurry vision. I like feeling energized and happy. I've been taking care of myself, but the insulin is my lifeline. It's what kept me from having to be hospitalized back in August.
I guess if my numbers don't stay in a good place, I can always go back on insulin. It wouldn't be the worst thing in the world, not if it helps me sustain my health. I guess I should discuss these fears with my doctor.
Meantime, I'll continue to exercise, eat well and watch myself ... and if that includes minding my health in my dreams, so be it.
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