One Month "Anniversary"

It's been exactly a month since I was diagnosed with Type II diabetes. So far, things are ... okay. My vision has cleared up, my blood sugar is somewhat stable and I'm definitely feeling a lot better.

On the other hand, I still have a lot of weight to lose, which can be frustrating -- especially because I now feel like I'm going against the clock. I know that losing weight will make it easier for me to control my diabetes in the long run, but I'm 37 years old and my already sucky metabolism is slowing down. I just hope that I can improve my health more quickly than the disease progresses.

Today, for the first time in a month, I was really craving sugar. Perhaps the little bit of sugar I had yesterday did it? It really is an addiction. I managed to beat the cravings by having sweet, but not sugary things. I had some orange herbal tea and a plum ... and one Andes mint that they gave us with the check in the restaurant. After that, I was alright. Still, it surprised me that I was suddenly wanting the sweet after going for a month without.

I'm wondering if I can satisfy my sweet tooth by having sweets in other ways. I'm going to do a little experiment and buy some chocolate and vanilla bath soaps and see if bathing in sweetness -- but not eating it -- will work for me. I mean, if I can't really enjoy the luxury of having a cupcake with swirls of chocolate icing, I might as well pamper myself with it, right? I'll let you know if this turns out successful .... or if I end up eating the soap.

All told, though, I'm proud of how I've done this past month. I've taken all my meds and have stuck to my eating plan about 98 percent of the time. Now I just have to do this next month ... and the month after and the month after that, and so on. I really want to make it to 40 and still have a good quality of life.

Highs And Lows

I've been officially diagnosed as a Type II diabetic for two weeks now, and I'm learning is that it's a constant balancing act. Sometimes my blood sugar can dip too low unexpectedly, and sometimes it will spike. I'm getting better at recognizing the warning signs and keeping it within an acceptable range, but I still haven't quite mastered this disease.

Take today, for example. We spent the night at my in-laws so I asked them to pick up some diabetes-friendly food for me. I began the day with my bs at a nice 97, then had a healthy breakfast of Cheerios, whole wheat toast and coffee. Lunch was a veggie burger, salad and low-fat yogurt. We then went downstairs to swim because it was such a gorgeous day. I did a few laps and treaded water for about a half hour, but didn't feel exhausted; I just felt relaxed. In fact, after I emerged from the pool to dry off, I ended up falling asleep in the lounge chair.

Once we were back inside, though, I suddenly felt dizzy. My whole body started shaking and I was afraid that I might pass out; this is when I realized that I was having a "low," that my little workout had lowered my bs enough so that I was feeling it. I had a snack of cheese and fruit and the lightheadedness soon went away. I'm just glad that this happened in my in-laws' home and not on the train back to the city.

I think that I'm doing well so far in managing my diabetes, but I know that mistakes will be made along the way. I'm sure that I'll eat foods that cause a significant spike or have another "low" moment. Still, my numbers seem to be stabilizing as there's less fluctuation between meals, and I'm definitely losing weight. My bathing suit top almost slipped off of me today, which is a good thing! I don't expect to be perfect in this fight, but I do want to be prepared as a can. Surviving this weekend has given me even more confidence.

Taking Advantage Of A Bad Situation

While I'm certainly not happy to have diabetes, I figure that as long as I am dealing with, I can milk it for all it's worth.

The other day, my husband and I went out to eat at our favorite Tex-Mex restaurant. I ordered the veggie fajitas (skipping the tortillas), which comes with chips and dip. When I asked if I could get a garden salad instead, the waiter apologized and said that they can't make that substitute. I explained that I'm diabetic and that I was willing to pay extra for the salad ... and he ended up giving it to me for free. Thanks, Diabetes!

Also recently, I hailed an off-duty cab in the city when I was going back to my office after a doctor's appointment. The driver said he couldn't take me downtown, but when I made a big deal about how I was sick, he gave in and took me.

I normally don't believe in using a weakness to get ahead. I try not to cry in public because I don't want people feeling sorry for me, and when I was briefly in a wheelchair from my broken leg, I didn't want anyone to go out of his or her way. Still, it was nice to find that there is at least a little bit of a silver lining in having this disease.

Little Pricks

One of the questions I get asked the most is if it hurts to check my blood sugar or give myself insulin shots. No, it really doesn't, though after breaking my leg and having to have my bone popped back into place, my tolerance for pain has increased greatly.

Checking blood sugar is more annoying than painful. I have a One-Touch Ultra, which comes with a little needle that you pull back, and then it kind of ricochets into your finger. You then place the drop of blood on a test strip and it gives you a glucose reading. It hurts about as much as it does when you dig your nail into your finger (which isn't much), but sometimes I just can't get out enough blood. There are days when I get it on the first try, but then other times, I have to prick my fingers over and over again to get them to bleed enough -- even if I use a brand-new needle. I don't know why my fingers are so uncooperative, but they can suddenly turn against me when it comes to this task.

I try to make it "fun," though by turning the whole thing into a game. As the meter counts down from 5, I try to guess what my blood sugar number will be. I also find myself humming that song from Little Shop Of Horrors -- the one where Seymour has to prick his fingers to feed blood to Audrey II. Plus, it's kind of cool to watch the test strip suck up the drop of blood. I've nicknamed them "vampire strips."

As for the insulin shots, the only thing that's uncomfortable about them is that they're injected into my stomach. The location freaked me out at first, but I'm getting used to it, and they really do hurt at all. They make the needles so thin that they just slip right into your body. They do leave a tiny mark, but that's it. I'm wondering, though, if I can arrange the marks into a cool design -- sort of like George Seurat did with his pointillism.

Other than that, these tasks aren't so bad. They take up very little of my time and it's so, so important that I get them done every day. So I do what I can to deal with them and try to stay positive about the whole process.